Things You Can't Pick in Public

Have you noticed lately that people are as guarded with their politics as they are with their religion when it comes to public conversation? We have all been given the impression that the whole world is full of Sodomites and flakes, so we don't want anyone to know that we are just normal, hard-working citizens.

There are rules, it seems, to the American Political Theatre. I feel that the rules are kind of stupid, so I am going to now list the rules and suggest some revisions. As candidate for King of the United States, I feel that this is not at all presumptuous.

Rule # 1. The stupid people get to talk the loudest.

Revision- The stupid people get to sweep gutters and dig ditches. (all apologies to my strong ditch-digger fan base)

Rule # 2. The media is always liberal and controls information in order to spin the truth into political ammunition against conservatives.

Revision- The media broadcasts facts, and politicians do the necessary spinning. (Get yer own Ammo, Bub)

Rule # 3. It isn't socially acceptable to point out obvious flaws in logic, whether that logic comes from a politician or a real person.

Revision-It is socially unacceptable to not point out stupid shit, especially when said stupid shit is being spoken/broadcast via a public forum.

Rule # 4. We are required to flee from any conversation concerning race, unless all parties involved are discussing how bad white people are.

Revision-We are required to discuss race, and how race plays a part in our collective manipulation by the media and politicians.

Rule # 5. We are required to accept that things are just getting worse, because there is nothing we can do about it.

Revision-We will make the world a better place or die trying.

If you have a rule and a revision, or you just want to comment on these, please feel free to do so. If you are an idiot, please expect that I will point out your idiocy if you post a comment.